Don't Worry World, Christians Will Tolerate Homosexuality Soon Enough

Dear World:

I’m sure you’re quite fed up with the intolerance of Christians toward homosexuality. Perhaps you’re wondering when we’re finally going to catch up with the rest of society. If so, I just want to give you a word of reassurance. We’ll tolerate homosexuality soon enough. Just give us some time.

First of all, it’s not surprising that we oppose it. Although the Bible never condones hatred of other people, it does say that Christians are supposed to be intolerant of all sin, including homosexuality. But frankly, we don’t follow this rule very well.

Give us some time. I know we get angry when movies feature openly gay characters, but believe it or not, we used to get angry when movies flaunted sexual immorality on screen. We used to get upset when movies portrayed gratuitous violence or mocked God on screen. But we eventually got over it, and we’ll get over this too. Clear biblical commands haven’t stopped us from tolerating sins before, I’m sure this won’t be any different.

As a matter of fact, we’re a lot more tolerant toward sin that you might think--just not openly. We may be intolerant of the sin of homosexuality, but we indulge in sexual immorality online. We boycott Target for transgender bathrooms, but we’ll verbally abuse our spouses. We’re actually quite tolerant of sin...some sins are just easier to tolerate than others.

So let me conclude with a couple tips.

First of all, please understand that Christians are simply following God’s Word when they oppose homosexuality. No, we should never express this opposition in hatred or vitriol, but we are called to oppose it. But don’t worry, we often form opinions based off cultural shifts instead of the foundation of God’s Word.

Second, we’ll probably tolerate it eventually, so if you want to speed up the process, make it as attractive as possible. If that doesn’t work, continue making intolerance of it as unattractive as possible. You see, it’s a lot tougher for Christians to be intolerant of sins that are attractive. That’s why we tolerate gossip, gluttony, anger and lust--we like these sins.

So do your best to permeate the culture with it. Take every opportunity to promote it in our movies, tv shows, music, schools and politics. Teach it to our kids so that parents end up looking narrow-minded and “backwards.” It has worked before. We’ll come around. Soon enough, those that claim the name of Christ will welcome homosexuality with open arms--some already have.

If you persist in this, you might even succeed in exposing false Christianity.

But it might also wake us up to our own inconsistencies.

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Note: The satirical nature of this article is meant to challenge the Church of Jesus Christ, including the authors of this blog. May God challenge our thinking and reveal our own blind spots. ​